This blog explained depression to me in a way that I had never thought of.  Perhaps it would help for those who may be going through it. There are two parts.

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.ca/2011/10/adventures-in-depression.html

Part two

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.ca/2013/05/depression-part-two.html

Timothy,

It seems that feelings of depression, confusion and isolation, believing there is no one to confide in who understands what someone on tx is going through are common to many who do this therapy.  It is serious and damaging to one's psyche.  Looking at the long-term and realizing that there will be an end to treatment and you are not alone in these feelings helped me during some of the more steessful and despairing times during the course of treatment - and even after with some of the sides. 

You're right - having those we love and who care for us supporting us is very important and will help get us through this.  You can and will do this treatment.  There are those here who suffer more and some less, there are those who seemingly skate by, and others have sx so severe they need to stop treatment, but all are affected physically and emotionally.

Things are never as dark as they seem at times, and never as bright as well.  We just make the best of the hand dealt us and carry on to the best of our ability.  Trust those you love and your vision to see your way through this.  Getting rid of this virus will help tremendously - a worthy goal.

Take care.

Bill

Thanks for sharing that Timothy.

To my friends this a very sad subject, one of which if I could I would remove from the world but I can not. I only post this because MJ sent it to me as she is sitting next to me. We are tiring to understand why this happens to those we truly love, and try not to blame everybody including ourselves.
As many have mentioned, we all did what we could,with what we knew. We just didn't know better. Suicide happens in a depressed state, where first, memories relating to positive emotions become inaccessible, and in some cases, the multiple negative emotions triggered by depression can cause a confused state where even memories of negative events are inaccessible. This leads to a state that I have called idiozimia (idio=self, zimia=loss) or a loss of the sense of self. Secondly, prolongued stress (3 to 5 years, depending on the intensity of the stress, and how prolongued the stress is) damages the hippocampus and makes idiozimia more possible. The hippocampus is resppnsible for creating context (spatial, socail and emotional) for memories as well as activating memories according to context. When the hippocampus is damaged enough, events are seen out of context or in the wrong context. These leads to faulty thinkin. Helplessness, hopelessness, set in and the will to continue erodes. Suicidal thoughts might become not only natural, but seem quite logical and rational. At this point suicide is a question of when, not if. Idiozimia is a state that can happen in a question of days, or even hours (after prolongued stress). The symptoms of idiozimia are what should alert us to possible suicide risk. The symptoms are not the cause of suicide as many experts think, this is a subtle but big difference.
The symptoms of idiozimia (not all necessarily simultaneously)--cognitive constriction, lack of accessibility to memories, low-self esteem (an all the accompanying possible relations to negative self-views, such as burdensomeness, a lack of belongingness, social isolation, self-contempt, shame), pessimistic or negative outlook, bodily dissociation, diminished sense of free-will or agency, loneliness, isolation, lack of problem-solving skills (deficits in memory, concentration or attention, overgeneralized memories), lack of emotion regulation (irritability, agitation, anger issues, loss of distress tolerance), attentional problems, and sleep disturbancesshould be used to assess suicidal risk as a function of idiozimia. We must keep in mind that the mix of symptoms will vary from individual to individual, as well as through time. I believe that when a certain number of symptoms (which need to be determined) are present, suicide risk escalates very quickly, the more symptoms the higher the risk. It is imperative to understand that idiozimia can appear quite suddenly and without warning, and can disappear in just a few days or hours.
If mental health providers were aware of this, some of many potential suicides could've been prevented. Tragically, for most of us, even though we might have received some training or are familiar with some aspects of suicide, suicide hits us like a ton of bricks falling on top of us with no advance notice.

Does any of this make it easier NO IT DOES NOT AND NEVER. Please in these troubled times beware of those you love and talk to one another, we are all we have.