Hep C Discussion Forum

Minerva · Guru

Life gets in the way?

missycat · Senior Member

Hello thank u Heather :) Yep certainly a rollercoaster ride of emotions leading up to starting isnt it,I just want to start now and kill this thing!!! I was just wondering im sure this question has been asked lots of times on here,but what sort of food should i get in for myself?? iv got easy meals in for the kids and frozen homemade meals for them. but i really dont know what i will eat, so far i have soup soup and more soup lol. and is it best to stay away from red meat? i dont eat steaks or anything but i do like my spag bol and chilli,and are there times you Do feel like eating on tx? And is it harder to eat on the day of your shot?
Hope you all keeping well as you can be,i do cheak in everyday to see how you are all getting on....
thank you
kaz xxx

Minerva · Guru

Hiya Kaz,

You are sounding much more sure of what you are going to do!! Great to hear.

Your kids sound wonderful too Kaz. I actually felt i got closer to mines during tx...i'd been so busy prior to it and it did give us time to spend together, even tho i was unwell for some of it. Your kids will pick up on how you are feeling, so if you are confident, they will be too. Even if you are unwell. Just reminding them it is not forever and it is to make mummy better should help to put their minds at rest, if needed.

Wish you all the best with it Kaz, and you have all our support here too.
Hugs
Heather
xxx
p.s. Love your new pic Jill - hope all is well with you. xxx

missycat · Senior Member

Thanks again for your support & kick up the bum hahaha.
You are right Brendan, Had a wobbley moment looking for a get out clause,my moods are all over the place, iv had a weekend of trying to put it out of my mind just for a while as i was only working myself up and nothing comes of that.
This site is amazing really, sometimes just knowing that theres others out there that know exactly how you feel is a great source of comfort.
I Am going to start a week today, its half term so going to have fun with my kids we going bowling tomorrow,got to stock the cupboards up. my son is being amazing.
I have told my little girl tht mummy going to be bit poorly,i didnt make a big deal of it just a little convatsation walking to the park, well it was like she already knew she was amazing, she said sometimes that happens mummy,shes had some health problems herself with hospital visits so she did seem to understand.then she said well i can make my own juice now smile which she indeed can bless her.
Ive been writing alot down,iv wrote a letter to myself for when im on tx, i keep imaging the feeling that iv started so i cant get rid of this virus that must be a amazing feeling,even if you feel like s**t all i can do is get it done
My doctor hasnt pressured me just said its best i start soon and the sooner i start the easier it is to clear,and my nurse has just said lets give it a shot biggrin , she really did say that made me giggle, but only if im ready which i am.

When i stand at the crossroads,theres only 1 way i want and have to go even if it scary!

Im signing off now,thanks again and hi to those of u i hadnt spoken too. Heather what you said really got through & jill, what a lovely new pic of you.

sorry for any spelling mistakes, im getting nagged to get of my own laptop kids ah. bye for now wink

Kaz xxxxxxxxxx

kaz.xxxxx

Cinnamon Girl · Guru

Hi Kaz, me again. Just wanted to say that Heather is right - the decision has to come from you, in consultation with your doc. It`s not up to your relatives or us for that matter. Please don`t think any of us are being harsh - we have your best interests at heart. You have to decide what is best for you given your particular circumstances and state of health.

Find out all you can, make your plan and try to keep as calm as you can while you sort it out. Yes, I agree with Heather, it is normal to be nervous beforehand, but if you do decide to go ahead with tx now please know that we will be here to give you support and advice. If you feel that you`re not ready, for whatever reason, we will not judge you. No-one has the right to do that.

Take care, love and hugs Jill xxx

Hi Dee, I love that Serenity Prayer, it is timeless. Hope you`r e doing ok. xx

Minerva · Guru

Hi Kaz,

It is normal to worry pre-tx. Afterall, no-one knows how it is going to affect them and when you read about the sides, you worry you will get all of them. Most people do have sides, but not all at the same time and there are ways of coping with them too.

I think that what you are going thru is pre-tx nerves, which is totally understandable. But it is really empowering when you do start tx because you then know that you are taking control of the virus and doing something about it. That can be a real motivator.

I think you have been psyching yourself up to starting. You need to consider whether you will feel you have let yourself down if you postpone, or whether that is what is really best for you at the moment. Try and seperate what is normal fear (at the prospect of starting something new and potentially scary), from whether you are perhaps not at the right point in your life for doing tx....although i also agree that decision could be influenced by biopsy results etc, if there was damage there to warrant doing it sooner rather than later.

For me, if i had put my tx off, and i also contemplated that pre-tx (also a single parent with 2 kids and not a lot of support) i would have had it hanging over my head until i did it. In the end, i wanted to get it out of the way.

We can all give advice Kaz but essentially the decision is down to yourself and no-one has any right to judge your informed decision so don't let that influence you.

Hugs
Heather
xxx

DGiga · Senior Member

Hi Kaz, It is nice to meet you and welcome to the forum. I agree with what everyone is telling you, especially Brendan. Find out just what is going on before you start worrying. My MD sent me to a gastroenterologist who did a liver biopsy and blood work. He determined what shape my liver was in, what type Hep C I have and he also put me on tx (treatment for Hep C). I went to see him every 2 wks at first for more blood work and then once a month. I am finished now. I was aiming for 48 wks but near the end the dr. took me off because my platelets were too low for me to continue. I completed 35 wks out of 48. I am undetectable at this point since around Christmas. I will know in the beginning of March if I am still undetectable. My whole point is that you need to speak with your Dr. to get this rolling. I'm sure you have heard the Serenity Prayer:

                                                               God grant me serenity
                                                               to accept the things I can not change.
                                                               Courage to change the things I can,
                                                               And the wisdom to know the difference.

Hugs Dee

Greg · Guru

Hi Kaz,
First I'd like to say welcome to the forum, you have found a wonderful resource for information and support. I'm only into my third week of tx, On the day I was due to start I was like you ready to say "no way". My body's self defense mechanisms kicked in saying "your going to do what to my body for 48 weeks". nope not gonna do it. I'm so thankfull that I have this wonderfull nurse and fantastic GP who patiently sat down with me and explained what the consequences would be for me if I did not start tx. I read as much as I could about tx and sx and really understood what I was in for.

That outcome would be me not living much longer, and the effects would be far worse that what I'm experienceing at the moment, which surprising is very little. I have a grand daughter who I adore very much, (were going swimming later today she's three and loves grand-dad being in the pool), and having this treatment will allow me to have a much longer and healthier life so I can enjoy watching her grow up and be part of her life. Get as much information as you can about tx and sx you'll find some great links on the stickies on the front of the forum.

I am so glad to have taken that first step toward getting rid of this virus, after my first shot I was so relieved it was so easy. The hardest step you will take is that first one, you won't be alone Kaz. Whatever decision you make no one here will judge you.
Be well be strong.
Greg

-- Edited by Greg on Friday 18th of February 2011 11:18:11 PM

BJ · Guru

Gidday Kaz,

To be honest, you sound like you are looking for an excuse to not do tx, when you know damn well that your kids need you, and you are not going to be any good to your seven year old if the viral disease progresses quickly.

On the other hand, if you commence tx now, would these same relatives who had the harsh words you spoke of, be willing to help you keep the house and look after the kids, because you are not going to be able to carry on as usual, while you are undergoing tx.

As Steff suggests, you need to educate yourself , I would suggest quickly, so that you can make a wise decision, or at least be helped to choose the right decision. I don't mean to pry, and you can tell me to go an jump..., but is this sudden not wanting to do tx, some sort of protest against being made to feel guilty or whatever. You did seem to know what you wanted and now don't, but I do feel you need to educate yourself about the virus. Find out just how sick you are and then perhaps make a decision on doing tx, based on how much support you'll need and have, your family's needs as well as your own, financial matters, your health etc;

I believe, if your health proves to be strong and the virus not very active, you may have time to prepare properly, and I mean properly as in educate yourself quickly, identify the damage the virus has done etc; as opposed to some bull**** mental (as you ever be) preparation. If you are sick from the virus, it can start to affect you to the point that is much, much worse than tx would ever make you feel, so in that instance, tx would have to be carried out quickly. I had started to feel the effects of the virus before I started tx , and in the 3 or 4 years prior to doing tx, my life had been sliding down a slippery slope, that seemed one way. When I underwent tx, I did have some very bad days, but in comparison to my last year leading upto starting tx, the last year of the nearly 18 months that I was on tx, was much better than before tx.

I know people need time to get over finding out about being infected, but 6 months - please, fair enough after your husband died that must have been terrible for you and the kids, but otherwise you do seem to be avoiding tx. Maybe that's just me, I think everyone that's infected should get rid of the virus asap, once everything else is in order, whereas others think ignore it if it isn't a problem. The latter idea of ignoring this disease almost ensures it'll become a problem!

You haven't mentioned what the position of your doctor was on you doing tx, were they trying to get you to do tx?

I'm probably not much help to you here, because I don't think any excuse is good enough to stop anyone from seeking tx for HepC, but at he same time, I do agree if other matters are more important and the virus is stable, that providing precautions to guard against spreading the infection are undertaken, tx can be put on to simmer as it were, until things that excluded tx are resolved.

I'm sure other members will be along to join in this discussion, so perhaps you can at least get a balanced perspective. Rather than doting along at the whims of doctors, I prefer to get as much info as I can, so I am in control rather than possibly less concerned medical staff.

Anyway, I'd better sign of before the medical profession sues me for thinking bad thoughts or something.

Cheers,

Brendan.

furious furious furious VIRUS KILLER furious furious furious

Fnzol · Member

I just cant think about anything else at the moment im so scared.

Scared of what? The unknown?

Consider the energy that you're expending on that that you should be saving for yourself during treatment. Not to minimize the feelings that you're having, but you'll soon find that it's not so bad. You're building it up into something that is not commensurate with what the treatment and sides are really about.

Relax! Having kids was way more stressful than this whole business.

Cinnamon Girl · Guru

Hi kaz, in answer to your question, I put off doing tx until I felt emotionally ready for it and had my life sorted out to a point where I felt I could do it. I also lost my husband, nearly 4 yrs ago, so I understand some of what you went through - the grief and shock just takes you over for a long while and we do what we have to do to survive.

BUT on the positive side doing this tx feels like such a good step forward for me and this wonderful forum and great bunch of people has helped me so much. I would really encourage you to find out as much info as you can and ask lots of qustions, fear of the unknown is often a lot worse than dealing with the facts.

You`ve done really well stopping the drink Kaz and I wish you the very best of luck.

I love your avatar by the way! love and hugs, from Jill xxx smile

-- Edited by Cinnamon Girl on Friday 18th of February 2011 03:03:08 PM

missycat · Senior Member

Thank you for that link,it has some useful info` I just cant think about anything else at the moment im so scared. feel like my heads going to explode!!!!Im ready as im going to be i think,everyone must question it? i dont know.
im normally very good at picking myself up dusting myself off. theres loads i should be doing sounds silly but things like deep cleaning the kitchen and painting the bathroom but im just wondering around thinking getting nothing done,wish i could just get away from myself. im sorry im not normally like this grrrr.........
No i havent had any tests like that i have liver funtion tests and iv had a endoscopy,and a liver scan. i dont ask the doctors any questions cause im scared. i just go along if they ask me to do so hmm

I felt so ready at the beginning of the week. need to find some strength and stop moaning and get on wiv it.

thanks again for the link ive saved onto my computer.

kaz xxx

greenqueen · Guru

Hi Kaz,

It sounds like you're being pressured by what others deem you "should" do. Have you had any tests, such as a liver biopsy or fibroscan, to determine the condition of your liver? Have you any idea how long you've had the virus?

Here's some info about making treatment decisions:

http://www.hcvadvocate.org/hepatitis/factsheets_pdf/Treatment_Decision_Guide_10.pdf

I took a few years to reach a decision. Firstly, I wanted to make sure I had all the facts and then a close one died and my sister was diagnosed with terminal cancer. The loss of your husband not long ago must be devastating and having to be strong for your kids sake.

You need to make sure you have a strong support system in place, beforehand, as Catie has said.

Love Steff xx

Catie · Veteran Member

PS have just read your post 'starting soon' so my words are echoing what others have said - will be sending good strong thoughts on the 28th smile

Hi Kez

it is good being able to come here and 'talk' isn't it - my partner Greg is having treatment - early days yet but he's doing a great job

if you family have nagged you to take treatment perhaps they would like to come on here and look at all the resources so they know how to best help you and your children while it's happening - LOTS of info here - i truly believe knowledge is power

wonderful that you have stopped drinking alcohol - takes great strength to stop blocking out emotional pain and face it - hoping your days are getting brighter

life does feel like it gets in the way indeed - unfortunately 'waiting' for something to happen just doesn't work ... it's a scarey thing to comtemplate this treatment - the ony 'advice' that i can offer is that you set up as much as you can in advance - have all your support systems in place before you start - or at least the ones you think you might need

take good care of yourself - Cate =))

-- Edited by Catie on Thursday 17th of February 2011 08:32:38 PM

missycat · Senior Member

I have stopped drinking for a while now, I was just saying a bit about me as im new here. confuse

x
sorry should o made that bit more clear.opp`s x

-- Edited by missycat on Thursday 17th of February 2011 06:28:10 PM

-- Edited by missycat on Thursday 17th of February 2011 06:35:31 PM

Fnzol · Member

Quit drinking immediately.

missycat · Senior Member

Hello, this site is still all new to me hmm

But iv found myself popping on when i have spare few mins.
I was wondering if any of you have put off treatment?

I had to put off treatment for a few reasons, When i was told i had hep c of course it was a shock and i would have need time to deal wiv that alone,but sadly 6 months after i was told my husband died leaving me a single mum head of the household me? I had to be there for my kids and helping them wiv there pain my youngest is now 7.
I hit the drink in the evenings to block it all out. then felt guity as a mother for doing that but there really is no logic in these things.

Then about 6 months ago family members said a few short sharp things about the fact i SHOULD start tx, however i only felt ready about a month ago i found a strengh from some where in me to do this,
I couldnt sleep for feeling guilty for not doing what i `should` be.......

I also remember watching a tv programme about people with very serious illness`s and i just felt worthless that i should be doing something,i dont feel like that now, i think the most important thing is to be mentally ready (well as you`ll ever be).

So yeah, would like to know if you put off treatment and why you choose to do so or if you could just face it immediately?

Thanks Kaz xxxxxxxxxxxxx

-- Edited by missycat on Thursday 17th of February 2011 02:59:38 PM

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